Diagnosis Autism

What do you do after your child is diagnosed with autism? First, give yourself time to accept and process the news. It’s a lot to accept. It really is. Next, start to read about autism – everyone seems to know someone who has a friend who’s kid has autism - but do research on your own. Find out what types of therapies and services are available. You know your child best and you will be your child’s best advocate. And finally, don’t wallow in self-pity or guilt – life can be much, much worse than a diagnosis of autism! See your child for the wonderful, amazing child he or she is. Remember the baby you fell in love with and know that there is nothing you did to cause the diagnosis of autism.

Now you have had time to process (and breath), done some research into autism, it is time to take charge and begin planning for an independent future for your child. Accept that independent doesn't look the same for every individual with Autism, however your goal should be for your child to live as fulfilling and independent of a life as possible. Don’t think that there is a miracle cure – there isn’t -- and don’t become intimidated by all the types of services and treatments available. There is a long, hard road ahead of you so don’t be afraid to ask people for help. Reach out to your family and friends to tell them of the diagnosis, accept their support don’t let the diagnosis of autism isolate you or your child.

If you are a “joiner” find a local parent advocacy group. They can help guide you through the steps of getting home services, developing an IEP, and looking towards long term goals. If you are not a “joiner” visit websites and follow some parent bloggers that you enjoy – they can provide many insights into future based on their personal experiences.

Don’t overlook your other children because therapies and appointments consume so much of your time. Plan “dates” with your other children and put in that quality time. Make sure they understand you love them just a much as your child with autism – be present when you are with them and make every second count. The number of minutes may not be split evenly between your children, however the quality of the minutes should be rich. Don’t give up having hopes and dreams for your child with autism – you may have to adjust the hopes and dreams slightly but don’t give up having them. A diagnosis of autism is not the end of the world for your child or your family, it just means that a different road is being taken to adulthood. Don’t underestimate or discount your child’s abilities – if you set your expectations low then there will be little growth or achievement. Set them high and surpass what everyone else things your child can accomplish. Surprise the world.

I’ve discussed some of the” don’ts”, now I’ll go over some of the “do’s”.

Keep your sense of humor – you need to laugh when you think things are horrible and can’t take another thing going wrong. Laugh when your child gets that permanent Sharpie marker and tattoo’s his face, arms and body. Laugh when he spills black fingerprint powder all over his white furniture, white carpet, white walls and your white bathroom because he tries to clean it up with windex (and for those of you who don’t know, fingerprint powder is actually dried indian ink so adding liquid makes is liquid black ink). Laughter is your greatest friend – find joy and keep it in your life.

Learn from your child with autism – they can teach you a great deal about yourself. They teach you how to be patient, how to be creative, how to be structured and organized, and most of all they teach you tolerance.

Use your time wisely and don’t waste energy on negativity or debates that lead nowhere. You may hear negative comments and see “looks” when things don’t go exactly as expected in public – ignore those people. Smile, remain strong and do what is right and best for your child. Use the opportunity to educate others in the community about autism and your child’s needs. Always focus on your child and advocate for their needs. Remember, YOU are the best advocate for you child. #autism #specialeducation #specialneeds #autismeducation #autismdiagnosis